FRAGMENTS OF MY LIFE

# I dont understand whats wrong with me, these feelings that I have i dont know why, the crazy it seems the silly it is; then you touched my heart and everything feels right.

# I dont know how to start a day with- a morning news? a song? Or a tea filled cup, I suddenly realized I missed you wake me up

# when I go to bed I swear to myself that I am going to think less about you tonight, then I think what are the things that I dont want to think about you; my mind goes on thinking, i dont know what and till when. I woke up in the morning and realize oh no I spend another might thinking about you.

# you love pink but I love blue, you are genuk but I am kurus. You are short and I am tall. We are different but I dont know what binds us together. May be we've similar heart or may be we've one heart.

# I started loving white roses to red, in colors my eyes move towards pink very quick. I am enjoying vanilla ice cream. I started having too much sweet and salty, always add 2 hrs when I check my time and developing slight blend towards cleanliness. Its scary but its true. I am not myself anymore its you. The only 3 things that says its still me are - I dont use blusher , i dont get periods and i still love pain :)

# 1st line which blew my mind :- I take you more than a friend.

2nd line which blew my mind :- everytime i chat with you the feeling is different.

3rd line which blew my mind :- you are my love, you are my life and you are my everything.

4th line which blew my mind :- you ease my pain, and it continues. I have no words to explain this because you have already blown my mind.

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The start of the day says how the whole day is going to be. I would not call it a total pissed of morning rather I had a lot of rest and time to surf net. The beginning was enthusiastic. Later when I had to spend one and half an hour waiting for the bus which gets me to changu Narayan, my job site, I had a feeling that my day is spoiled. I hate to wait even when it is to my friends but this was the worst wait I ever did. For a sec I thought of taking a leave for a day today. But I waited; I don’t know where the word called patience came to me today. I was destined to reach late and I did as well. Of course I was expecting the questioning face of my chief. Then came my 2km walk, which was not worst but real tiresome, to the lab site. I was supposed to learn to make the lab report from the senior lab technician and since I arrived late, he had already finished it. Bad luck for me or maybe not. The virus has affected pc so much that there is no option than formatting it. He needed to make the report again and that I will definitely be there the next time hehe. My quest to learn total station was fulfilled today. I learnt layout but still need to learn to collect the cross section data, its not going to take me long anyway :). My other responsibility was to manipulate the cross section data and generate the reduced level of each location. It was a piece of cake for me but the three hundred data took me a lot of time I didn’t even realize its late or over time; I should say; though I don’t get paid for OT HEHE. Here again time for me to wait for the bus my most irritating part of job. :). On my way to home all I thought was to get home quick before the clinic gets close so as to get the insulin for my mom. Thank god I am not too late. Now I am preparing dinner somehow relaxed my hectic day is going to be over. Good night all.

It was 28th April and I don’t know how, when i saw someone carry red rose, I wished to plant a rose of my own. Me loving a white rose is a different story to tell, that time I expressed my wish to my cousin sister asking when I could find it. Everything was instant and so was her answer. By somehow I found she was excited too which made me more determined. She knew the place to find. Together we went to steal a branch with the hope the rose would grow healthy if the plant is stolen as the saying explains. Someone help me with a knife so as to cut a few branches. I didn’t know how to plant it. Since i was already determined I never bothered about it. The thorn cut my skin to bleed; a small price to pay for stealing. Lol. When I got back home most people told it'll not grow. I was not convinced that my drop of blood was a waste :-) I turned out every pages in my memory to remember how to cut the branch and plant the rose because by somehow I knew I was taught to plant a rose; may be in 4 or 5th standard, I can’t remember. After I planted it’ll was very happy. I thought about my mom who was in ICU that time.
Today when I see the plant I can find leaves coming out of the spot where it used to thorns. I am excited to see when it gives white roses. My trickle of blood was not a waste. I water the plant everyday and it is lively lately. The leaves are tiny but green. I must thank to the few days pain or the dryness would have made it crack. Right now it has 9 leaves and 4 more modes where the leaves are going to emerge. I will definitely add a page when my first lovely white rose rises and smiles at me.

It has been a week or so I have joined a construction company after completion of my bachelor degree in Civil Engineering. Life as we know it is tough really tough I should say or from the way others have described. Since this is my first time on job and had no experience in my technical field, I took it as my learning phase and determined my path is not going to be a piece of cake. My uncle helped me get the job through his friend who is a contractor. I am appointed by the contractor to work for the consultant in a road project funded by ADB. This is why my real opponent in case of argument is unclear. Disputes are inevitable in any project and i must say I have been lucky to observe two or three of first time experience of disputes between the two parties.

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