FRAGMENTS OF MY LIFE

……….. I told you folks I’d be back again coz I’m not done with it yet. Took some time myself but can’t take this GRE-the way it bludgeoned me last night when I woke up at around 2. At a time, I thought I was dreaming – a part of my subconscious mind creating the words itself and the other searching for its meaning. The next- I wondered if it was my playlist in my cell phone running the word master-with words, their spellings, meanings, and their usage sequentially along with the background music which is definitely not dulcet. ‘ figment- F-I-G-M-E-N-T- invention of the mind, something imagined…. Damn what was its third meaning? Oh god! I forgot it.’ Shall I listen to the chapters from the inception to the end?? Think, muse, ponder, ruminate whatever it’s called but try to get the meaning of the word figment. I don’t recall if I was murmuring or it was going just inside my head but I’m sure sleep didn’t come to me till I get the exact remaining synonyms. My mind was half sleeping and half awake as if somnoloquent so I had a scant chance of remembering the remaining synonym. Discord between my mind and body makes me feel I’m getting anxiety attacks, wanting me to kick out the bed sheets and blanket like a stubborn child; I guess I did. I couldn’t take the altercation ( in a sense my mind and body are two separate beings and not working in harmony), I scanned ( I’m wondering how I did that with my eyes closed- of course it wouldn’t have mattered had they been open coz my lights were out) for my cell phone. Yeah-under my sweet pillow which is on my left ( if you are wondering I have three pillow though I sleep alone hehe); exactly where I placed it before sleep. I’m bewildered- Unlike everyday how come it didn’t fall off my bed today? But what is this- no matter whatever button I press the screen doesn’t glow. Here goes my Chinese cell phone with a battery of spasmodic life cheating me. Now I have to switch on to charge the battery for which I have to get out of my bed, out of the net gingerly or get my blood sucked by hungry mosquitoes for my unscrupulous action. Oh God! Now I realized why the white faced gray haired every smiling English Instructor always tells that preparing for GRE is a grueling process. Shall I give up?? I don’t know who was uttering “Don’t give up! Don’t give up!” with the capital Ds like an incantation, sounds that echoed from far but reverberating my room or it’s just my mind or ears. Well I didn’t and that’s why I stick my right hand out of the net-Yes gingerly, my left hand holding the cell phone, to the switch beside my bed at the alcove. After connecting it to my cell phone, I took time to appreciate myself for keeping my room arranged everything in its own place; though I bungle something sometimes. LOL. Tell you what, I did everything without even opening my eyes- hope you believe I’m not a bungler now. hehe. Along with my hand I let a troop of mosquitoes which are now taking a marshal approach -buzzing- may be discussing who starts sucking my blood from where. While my left hand was busy switching on cell phone and searching for the meanings of the word into the word master my legs located the blanket and pulled it till my right hand reached for it to back me up from the mosquitoes. Yes I found the word and all three synonyms. Figment- F-I-G-M-E-N-T - invention of the mind; something imagined; myth.

When I woke up in the morning, I was content for my accomplishment the night before. Something’s itchy over my forehead and as I look at the mirror-three red boils- I’m not surprised because the way the mosquito troop projectile towards my head when I covered it with the blanket, one surely make it through.

First day of the class and I'm bewildered by the number of heads struggling to enter the GRE class through the sliding door; struggling as if being first makes them first to get the states VISA. As I entered made a glance which is both furtive to avoid others eye contact and askance to the only seat left that’s too close to the white board I can hardly look at. As I watched the room getting saturated, a part of me wanted to quit right after I started whereas the other wanting to try it once. The reverberating noise makes me feel the class is alive; my silence tells me I'm stuck up on something of which I don’t want to be a part of. My motive of getting into GRE; only to enrich my word power, might astonish many and it’s not that someone didn’t remark it as weird but I guess I love doing the stuffs without a purpose. As I wait, diving into the pool of memory of college life which was skittish and boisterous and reckless, when I never missed to make a witty remark for every statement anyone makes, for the teacher who might be soporific, I realize how different I have built myself into. I had enough time to observe the class clearly; to smile at the cute girls with chewing gums, chuckle at the guys with a Bekham hairstyle and raising my bros to those familiar faces I knew or may be just thought I know.

The man, white face gray hair (it definitely isn’t natural), entered the room with an elegant smile in his face (I'm bewildered by the way he never misses to maintain the same smile every time he enters the room); fits appropriately to be a foreign language instructor. He, after a brief glance to the class, slides the hot seat arranged for him to the side and started the anatomy of GRE, explaining how the course is premeditated for us. It’s a miracle the way everyone maintained a complete silence, curious eyes glued to the white board; after all it did worth five thousand. The teacher began pouring us with words; lengthy, short, awry (in the way it is pronounced) and weird (I don’t know why I think that way); his mind is definitely a cornucopia of words- ours an empty pot............(to be continued)(coz Im nt finished yet) hehehe